Today Belay asked when he was going to turn white. He showed Andy the palms of his hands and said
"look, my hands are already white." I'll never forget seeing him show Andy those sweet pink palms on those tiny hands.
Immediately we both jumped in telling Belay how beautiful his skin was and how he was always going to be this beautiful brown. He told us he wished he was white, and that he didn't want to be the only brown one in the family anymore. I showed him a picture of all of us, including his "opia mom" (birth mom) and asked him who he thought was beautiful in the picture. He pointed to his opia mom. This went on for a while.
Then at bed time Andy talked with him about how on thomas the train there were lots of blue trains and only one red train (James) and reminded him that James was his favorite. Belay then told Andy that he didn't want to be all alone. When I went in to kiss him goodnight he told me he was sad because he missed is opia mom and wished he could just see her one time!
Can this really be happening already to my 3 year old? Is he really able to verbalize this kind of grief at 3? We talk ALL the time about Ethiopia, his birth mom, and his beautiful brown skin so it isn't totally out of the blue that he brings this up. It just caught me off guard how articulate he was about his feelings. That he point blank said he wanted to turn white! My heart feels a little heavy tonight. How do I help my sweet little boy?
Friday, June 15, 2012
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
my proudest moment in parenting to date
We took the kids out for a quick dinner tonight after swimming all day. When the waiter dropped off our waters at the table and Adi immediately responded with "thank you" and then Belay did the same. This happened without prompting, at all! Not a single word out of my mouth. They both said thank you on their own accord because they knew it was the right thing to do. The waiter mumbled a quick "wow, good manners" and it literally brought tears to my eyes (which isn't all that hard to do these days with the pregnancy hormones raging).
I have never been more proud, honestly. This means they learned something. I have taught them to have manners. Whoohooo. Now, will it ever happen again?
I have never been more proud, honestly. This means they learned something. I have taught them to have manners. Whoohooo. Now, will it ever happen again?
Sunday, May 27, 2012
life continues
How about a list to catch up on things?
- I'm 30 weeks pregnant now and have a nasty case of PUPPS (pruitic urticarial papules and plagues of pregnancy) basically very itchy hives that cover me from head to toe. I would have never guessed this would be my down fall this pregnancy. I sucks and I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy. The worst part is that heat makes them so much worse. Seeing that I'm due in August this is very sad news. I don't sleep at night because I'm scratching all night long. The ones that keep me up the most are on my fingers and toes. Imagine having 10 bee stings on your fingers and trying to sleep through that. I have tried all sorts of medicine, nothing has helped. I haven't done steroids yet as it's really not good for the baby, and besides, as soon as I'm done with a course of prendisone the hives will come right back.
- Speaking of pregnancy, this time around I really know the meaning of exhaustion. Between keeping Adi and Belay fed, clothed, and bathed (sometimes),working in the evenings and on the weekends, attempting some sort of "house keeping", and helping Andy out with school events as much as I can I am totally spent. This means that anything that soothes my soul like spending time with friends and family doesn't exist. I blame some of this exhaustion on not sleeping due to the PUPPPS, but in reality I don't think anyone sleeps when they are growing a human being.
-Work. Where do I even begin? I really like working, I do. I don't really like my schedule. I started working evening and weekends when the kids were smaller with the intention of switching to days when they started preschool. Well they started preschool and I never got the day shifts I was hoping for. Again, it hasn't been that bad. But now things are a bit tougher. We are extremely short staffed (big surprise in the nursing world, huh?) Like we have 3 nurses to cover what 10 nurses used to cover. It sucks. I did not sign up for working this much. Again, this wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't in my 3rd trimester and so tired.
- I reminded Andy to be so very thankful that with 10 weeks left until the baby arrives I have not harassed him one bit about all the things that we still haven't done. Meaning that he is really cramping my nesting urges. We have no name, no car that will fit all 5 of us, no room/space for baby yet, no plans for maternity leave, just to name a few. If I could do these things myself, they'd be done. But Andy is one busy man:)
- I am really hoping some of these things above get remedied soon. But I'm not holding my breath. Although summer break does start next week...
- We celebrated our 2nd family day on May 2nd. We headed to the knoxville zoo for the day. We let the kids pick where we go to dinner. They picked mexican, as usual, but insisted that they dress up. Adi put on her fanciest dress and Belay wore a tie. Again, all the kids idea. We ate a lot of ice cream and tried time and time again to get them to understand why we celebrate family day.
- There are some really big changes going on with Andy's work and School. Nothing official yet, but big, kinda scary, things hopefully happening. I just keep reminding myself that nothing great comes easy.
- Kids have almost finished up with soccer. Practices are fun. Only 2 kids on the team actually like the games though.
- Belay learned to talk when he turned 3 and hasn't shut is mouth once since. Literally, the kid never stops talking, loudly. His middle name Tesema means "he will be heard" translated into 3&4 yr old language is " a very loud little boy" and oh how fitting it is.
3 has been a challenge in so many ways with him. I do remember Adi being tough at 3 too. Now that Adi is 4 she seems to be the most fun kid to hang out with ever. Belay does still have glimpses of the sweet boy we once knew. Anytime he sees a dandelion he picks it for Adi. He also really wants to name the baby "flower". He is starting to get more used to the idea of another sister, but also talks a lot about when he gets a brother from Africa (this, by the way is not actually happening any time soon if at all:)
- Adi has learned and grown so much this year. She will do one more year of Pre-k before she starts kindergarten. I was really young for my class all through school and didn't like it at all. I don't want Adi to have to deal with the same thing.
I'm hoping to upload some pictures soon, but I think that captures most of what is going on in our lives right now. My main goal is to get a few days off work to escape to a beach with the kids before the baby comes. Not sure if it's gonna happen, but a girl can dream right?
- I'm 30 weeks pregnant now and have a nasty case of PUPPS (pruitic urticarial papules and plagues of pregnancy) basically very itchy hives that cover me from head to toe. I would have never guessed this would be my down fall this pregnancy. I sucks and I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy. The worst part is that heat makes them so much worse. Seeing that I'm due in August this is very sad news. I don't sleep at night because I'm scratching all night long. The ones that keep me up the most are on my fingers and toes. Imagine having 10 bee stings on your fingers and trying to sleep through that. I have tried all sorts of medicine, nothing has helped. I haven't done steroids yet as it's really not good for the baby, and besides, as soon as I'm done with a course of prendisone the hives will come right back.
- Speaking of pregnancy, this time around I really know the meaning of exhaustion. Between keeping Adi and Belay fed, clothed, and bathed (sometimes),working in the evenings and on the weekends, attempting some sort of "house keeping", and helping Andy out with school events as much as I can I am totally spent. This means that anything that soothes my soul like spending time with friends and family doesn't exist. I blame some of this exhaustion on not sleeping due to the PUPPPS, but in reality I don't think anyone sleeps when they are growing a human being.
-Work. Where do I even begin? I really like working, I do. I don't really like my schedule. I started working evening and weekends when the kids were smaller with the intention of switching to days when they started preschool. Well they started preschool and I never got the day shifts I was hoping for. Again, it hasn't been that bad. But now things are a bit tougher. We are extremely short staffed (big surprise in the nursing world, huh?) Like we have 3 nurses to cover what 10 nurses used to cover. It sucks. I did not sign up for working this much. Again, this wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't in my 3rd trimester and so tired.
- I reminded Andy to be so very thankful that with 10 weeks left until the baby arrives I have not harassed him one bit about all the things that we still haven't done. Meaning that he is really cramping my nesting urges. We have no name, no car that will fit all 5 of us, no room/space for baby yet, no plans for maternity leave, just to name a few. If I could do these things myself, they'd be done. But Andy is one busy man:)
- I am really hoping some of these things above get remedied soon. But I'm not holding my breath. Although summer break does start next week...
- We celebrated our 2nd family day on May 2nd. We headed to the knoxville zoo for the day. We let the kids pick where we go to dinner. They picked mexican, as usual, but insisted that they dress up. Adi put on her fanciest dress and Belay wore a tie. Again, all the kids idea. We ate a lot of ice cream and tried time and time again to get them to understand why we celebrate family day.
- There are some really big changes going on with Andy's work and School. Nothing official yet, but big, kinda scary, things hopefully happening. I just keep reminding myself that nothing great comes easy.
- Kids have almost finished up with soccer. Practices are fun. Only 2 kids on the team actually like the games though.
- Belay learned to talk when he turned 3 and hasn't shut is mouth once since. Literally, the kid never stops talking, loudly. His middle name Tesema means "he will be heard" translated into 3&4 yr old language is " a very loud little boy" and oh how fitting it is.
3 has been a challenge in so many ways with him. I do remember Adi being tough at 3 too. Now that Adi is 4 she seems to be the most fun kid to hang out with ever. Belay does still have glimpses of the sweet boy we once knew. Anytime he sees a dandelion he picks it for Adi. He also really wants to name the baby "flower". He is starting to get more used to the idea of another sister, but also talks a lot about when he gets a brother from Africa (this, by the way is not actually happening any time soon if at all:)
- Adi has learned and grown so much this year. She will do one more year of Pre-k before she starts kindergarten. I was really young for my class all through school and didn't like it at all. I don't want Adi to have to deal with the same thing.
I'm hoping to upload some pictures soon, but I think that captures most of what is going on in our lives right now. My main goal is to get a few days off work to escape to a beach with the kids before the baby comes. Not sure if it's gonna happen, but a girl can dream right?
Sunday, April 15, 2012
First Soccer Game
Saturday morning the kids played their very first soccer game ever. It was a big moment in our house. They had practice last week and liked it but the game was a bit different.
When 3-5 yr olds play soccer it is most definitely like herding cats. My thoughts were that we might as well throw in a few extra balls to spice it up a bit. It couldn't have created anymore chaos and at least more than the one token ringer could have touched the ball.
A few words about the 'ringer'. He was at least a foot taller than the rest of the kids, obviously played in many games before, and was probably 7. Okay, maybe he wasn't seven, but he sure as hell wasn't 3,4,or 5. He scored about 15 goals. Anytime one of his teammates (like Adi) got the ball, he stole it from them. He even tacked a teammate who was about to score a goal.
One of the dads finally asked the coach to take him out to give the other kids a chance and the coach replied with a laugh "yup, there's always one on every team" then she high fived the kid and left him in the game.
Once Adi got the hang of chasing the herd she did great. I may have even suggest that she throw a few elbows. Andy did not appreciate this advice but I think its the only way she got in the game:)
She was smiling, huffing, and puffing by the end. She was a little nervous at first about playing without her friend on the field next to her, seeing as they are the only 2 girls on the team, but after a few minutes she was over it.
Once in the car she told us, teary eyed, that she really wanted to get the ball in the "white, square, net thing" but that one boy wouldn't let anyone else touch the ball. This got me really fired up and I promised her next week it wouldn't happen again.
My girl has the right spirit alright. I wonder who she got her competitive side from?
Belay's only feedback from the game was that he never got a turn. We explained over and over that he had to go chase the ball and that no one was going to hand him his own ball to kick. During practice Belay had incredible focus. He took dribbling, running, and kicking very seriously. But he totally did not get the herd mentality of the game. He kept wandering off the field telling us that "my team is over now, can I have a snack". He is by far the smallest kid on the team and one of the youngest. But his best buddy is on the team with him, so that help.
When 3-5 yr olds play soccer it is most definitely like herding cats. My thoughts were that we might as well throw in a few extra balls to spice it up a bit. It couldn't have created anymore chaos and at least more than the one token ringer could have touched the ball.
A few words about the 'ringer'. He was at least a foot taller than the rest of the kids, obviously played in many games before, and was probably 7. Okay, maybe he wasn't seven, but he sure as hell wasn't 3,4,or 5. He scored about 15 goals. Anytime one of his teammates (like Adi) got the ball, he stole it from them. He even tacked a teammate who was about to score a goal.
One of the dads finally asked the coach to take him out to give the other kids a chance and the coach replied with a laugh "yup, there's always one on every team" then she high fived the kid and left him in the game.
Once Adi got the hang of chasing the herd she did great. I may have even suggest that she throw a few elbows. Andy did not appreciate this advice but I think its the only way she got in the game:)
She was smiling, huffing, and puffing by the end. She was a little nervous at first about playing without her friend on the field next to her, seeing as they are the only 2 girls on the team, but after a few minutes she was over it.
Once in the car she told us, teary eyed, that she really wanted to get the ball in the "white, square, net thing" but that one boy wouldn't let anyone else touch the ball. This got me really fired up and I promised her next week it wouldn't happen again.
My girl has the right spirit alright. I wonder who she got her competitive side from?
Belay's only feedback from the game was that he never got a turn. We explained over and over that he had to go chase the ball and that no one was going to hand him his own ball to kick. During practice Belay had incredible focus. He took dribbling, running, and kicking very seriously. But he totally did not get the herd mentality of the game. He kept wandering off the field telling us that "my team is over now, can I have a snack". He is by far the smallest kid on the team and one of the youngest. But his best buddy is on the team with him, so that help.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Little house horror
I cleaned my closet today. It was horrible and I blame it on being pregnant. Not just because I'm tired and way to lazy to hang my clothes, although thats part of it, but because of the 3 seasons of clothing.
A very nice friend loaned me a giant tub of maternity clothes which is great because this pregnancy is the exact opposite seasons as last and because I refused to buy anything I will only wear for a few month. I pulled out all my "post pardom" i.e. fat clothes to wear during the early months. There is no reason to put them away now when I'll need them again come august. Then of course all my normal clothes are there. My closet kinda exploded and the huge tub of maternity clothes was blocking the door way.
So, I fixed that today. It is pretty awesome. Andy thinks it will last 2 days.
During the process I found a few chapter books I saved from Christmas and gave them to Adi. Which, by the way, made me a rock star mom busting out a present out of no where. The truth is I forget they were there because my closet was such a mess. Point being, one of the books was a little house on the prairie book. Adi loves little house because I think one of her friends at school (who is a few yrs older) is reading them now. Apparently they play "little house' quite a bit at school. In fact Adi has requested that for halloween we as a family unit be "Ma, Pa, Laura, Mary and Carrie." Belay is totally cool with being one of the sisters.
Well I guess I never actually read the books as a kid. Sad, I know.
So I was a bit caught off guard as I began reading chapter one out loud and found myself explaining what it meant to shoot, hang, skin, smoke and salt a deer. Adi seemed to be following along ok with it. She made a few comments about how she is glad we don't live in the woods and asked if they didn't have refrigerators. Then came the part about the pig and how they used the bladder as a ball and I just couldn't do it anymore. How do you explain to your 3 and 4 yr olds about using a pigs bladder as a ball?
Anyways, all the talk about meat and hunting got the kids talking. Adi declared her love of meat (although she seems to prefer it refrigerated than cured) and Belay reaffirmed how gross eating meat is and that he hates it. Then he made the announcement.
The announcement that I'm sure all 3 yr olds make at some point. I know I made it. On my list was cake, mashed potatoes, and water.
Belays list at 3 yrs old...
Opia(oatmeal)
Grocery stores
Juice
Milk
Chocolate Milk
Almond Milk.
My son can live on liquids alone. And I love that grocery store was on the list. I guess he knows thats where his liquids, and oatmeal, come from.
I hope Little House on the Prairie stops talking about pig bladders and curing meat so I can keep reading it. It's not helping the battle in getting Belay to eat meat.
A very nice friend loaned me a giant tub of maternity clothes which is great because this pregnancy is the exact opposite seasons as last and because I refused to buy anything I will only wear for a few month. I pulled out all my "post pardom" i.e. fat clothes to wear during the early months. There is no reason to put them away now when I'll need them again come august. Then of course all my normal clothes are there. My closet kinda exploded and the huge tub of maternity clothes was blocking the door way.
So, I fixed that today. It is pretty awesome. Andy thinks it will last 2 days.
During the process I found a few chapter books I saved from Christmas and gave them to Adi. Which, by the way, made me a rock star mom busting out a present out of no where. The truth is I forget they were there because my closet was such a mess. Point being, one of the books was a little house on the prairie book. Adi loves little house because I think one of her friends at school (who is a few yrs older) is reading them now. Apparently they play "little house' quite a bit at school. In fact Adi has requested that for halloween we as a family unit be "Ma, Pa, Laura, Mary and Carrie." Belay is totally cool with being one of the sisters.
Well I guess I never actually read the books as a kid. Sad, I know.
So I was a bit caught off guard as I began reading chapter one out loud and found myself explaining what it meant to shoot, hang, skin, smoke and salt a deer. Adi seemed to be following along ok with it. She made a few comments about how she is glad we don't live in the woods and asked if they didn't have refrigerators. Then came the part about the pig and how they used the bladder as a ball and I just couldn't do it anymore. How do you explain to your 3 and 4 yr olds about using a pigs bladder as a ball?
Anyways, all the talk about meat and hunting got the kids talking. Adi declared her love of meat (although she seems to prefer it refrigerated than cured) and Belay reaffirmed how gross eating meat is and that he hates it. Then he made the announcement.
The announcement that I'm sure all 3 yr olds make at some point. I know I made it. On my list was cake, mashed potatoes, and water.
Belays list at 3 yrs old...
Opia(oatmeal)
Grocery stores
Juice
Milk
Chocolate Milk
Almond Milk.
My son can live on liquids alone. And I love that grocery store was on the list. I guess he knows thats where his liquids, and oatmeal, come from.
I hope Little House on the Prairie stops talking about pig bladders and curing meat so I can keep reading it. It's not helping the battle in getting Belay to eat meat.
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Ok, I'm Back
I got some of the kinks worked out on this site so I'm hoping it will be more enjoyable for me to write now. I'm not a computer savvy, in the least, so this will have to do. I've been feeling a title switch for a while now and this seems appropriate.( since we have both places to call our home)
The latest news in the house is the baby arriving this summer! Yup, I'm pregnant. 23 weeks along now and due early August. What an adventure this pregnancy has been! Doing it all over again with 2 kids in tow is slightly different, to say the least. I'm feeling good now, after the nausea subsided around week 12. As much as is sucks at the time, I know how lucky I am that it only lasts a few weeks for me. And I never actually vomit. Just unbearable nausea around the clock for about 4 weeks.
I thought I was in the clear until the headaches began. Then, for the next 2 1/2 months straight I had mind numbing headache. Now, I had headaches with Adi but they were always tolerable and went away with some added magnesium. This time however, all I could do was lay on the couch with an ice pack on my head. My midwives got worried because nothing, not even strong rx pain pills, took the pain away. They sent me to the neurologist convinced I had a brain tumor.
Ha ha. I knew I did not have a tumor and that it was all hormones, but no one wants to take on the responsibility of something like headaches. So, needless to say, I did not have a tumor and my headaches have come and gone.
And now I have been blessed with hives all over my body. Can't say I saw this coming. I still don't know for sure that its pregnancy related, but I have no other explanations. No one else in the house has them, I have stripped sheets, bought new sheets, cleaned like crazy. Nothing has helped.
Enough about me. How about a little info on baby #3? Well, she is a she! We are pretty thrilled about it. By "we" I of course mean Adi. Life could have been pretty sad around hear if Adi had to deal with 2 brothers. She has grand plans of how the baby girl with sleep with her. Actually the baby is supposed to sleep under the sheets, at her feet. She also can't understand why we are having a hard time coming up with a name. She gives us new names everyday. I've been keeping a list so we can all look back at them one day. Here are a few...Aloosha,(an Adi made up one) Ivy, Emmy, Stormie (short for stormer from "Jem and the misfits") Dot Star Light( I have no idea) Alanee Lee (pretty creative, I have to say) Caroline (random, but she loves it ) Laura (I'm assuming little house on the prairie). And of course Belay has a few too...Baby spiderman and Peck-a-boo sissy (he apparently calls "pelicans" peck-a-boos)
Belay is in denial. He is telling everyone that he is getting a brother. Sorry buddy. But if you do ever get a brother someday, he will have brown skin like you.
We just spent a week in Florida with my inlaws. The kids had so much fun. They always do. The drive is brutal but oh so worth a week swimming with Gramma and Appa. These are a few of my favorite shots of the week.
this is how I feel after all this computer nonsense. |
The latest news in the house is the baby arriving this summer! Yup, I'm pregnant. 23 weeks along now and due early August. What an adventure this pregnancy has been! Doing it all over again with 2 kids in tow is slightly different, to say the least. I'm feeling good now, after the nausea subsided around week 12. As much as is sucks at the time, I know how lucky I am that it only lasts a few weeks for me. And I never actually vomit. Just unbearable nausea around the clock for about 4 weeks.
I thought I was in the clear until the headaches began. Then, for the next 2 1/2 months straight I had mind numbing headache. Now, I had headaches with Adi but they were always tolerable and went away with some added magnesium. This time however, all I could do was lay on the couch with an ice pack on my head. My midwives got worried because nothing, not even strong rx pain pills, took the pain away. They sent me to the neurologist convinced I had a brain tumor.
Ha ha. I knew I did not have a tumor and that it was all hormones, but no one wants to take on the responsibility of something like headaches. So, needless to say, I did not have a tumor and my headaches have come and gone.
And now I have been blessed with hives all over my body. Can't say I saw this coming. I still don't know for sure that its pregnancy related, but I have no other explanations. No one else in the house has them, I have stripped sheets, bought new sheets, cleaned like crazy. Nothing has helped.
Enough about me. How about a little info on baby #3? Well, she is a she! We are pretty thrilled about it. By "we" I of course mean Adi. Life could have been pretty sad around hear if Adi had to deal with 2 brothers. She has grand plans of how the baby girl with sleep with her. Actually the baby is supposed to sleep under the sheets, at her feet. She also can't understand why we are having a hard time coming up with a name. She gives us new names everyday. I've been keeping a list so we can all look back at them one day. Here are a few...Aloosha,(an Adi made up one) Ivy, Emmy, Stormie (short for stormer from "Jem and the misfits") Dot Star Light( I have no idea) Alanee Lee (pretty creative, I have to say) Caroline (random, but she loves it ) Laura (I'm assuming little house on the prairie). And of course Belay has a few too...Baby spiderman and Peck-a-boo sissy (he apparently calls "pelicans" peck-a-boos)
Kissing her sister |
who is freezing cold in the 90* day at the beach and falls asleep wrapped in a towel? Belay does! |
We just spent a week in Florida with my inlaws. The kids had so much fun. They always do. The drive is brutal but oh so worth a week swimming with Gramma and Appa. These are a few of my favorite shots of the week.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
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